Tanaka was walking around town, picking up groceries and necessities that his devilish sister had commanded him to get. It had been ridiculously hot for November, sweat was streaming off his face. Why couldn't Saeko-nee just get the dumb groceries herself? She has a car! He was walking past the electronics store on the way to the bakery when he saw it. A deluxe Nintendo 3DS engraved and packaged with the newest Pokemon Alpha game.
“Holy shit!” he nearly dropped the bags he was holding as he peered through the store window. He had been waiting for this game for months, and it was finally in stores! He had to have it. Now. He jogged the rest of the way home, grin plastered to his face.
To his horror, he had forgotten all about the strawberry cake he was supposed to get.
“Ryuu you idiot!” Saeko slapped him upside the head. “How are we supposed to celebrate mom's birthday without any cake?”
Nursing his head wound, he muttered a clipped “Sorry” as he exited the kitchen. Sighing, Saeko dragged him back into the kitchen.
“Oh no you don't! I'll go get the cake, you can go ahead and chop up the vegetables and start the stew without me. I'll be back in a half hour!”
His mind wandered off as he got the chopping board and the knife ready. Tanaka sang a little song to the rhythm of the chopping, listing off every pokemon he knew from first generation onwards.
By the time he had finished listing off the fifth generation pokemon, Saeko had come back with a sparkling princess cake, ready to be adored and loved by its recipient.
“Oi Ryuu!” Saeko called out loudly, even though there was only one wall separating the main entry way and the kitchen. He stepped out slowly, fearing retribution for his earlier mistake. “You saw the new DS and pokemon game in the store right? Are you getting Alpha or Beta?”
Tanaka let out a huge sigh of relief, glad that his sister was just as much of a fanatic as he was. “Alpha probably.”
Saeko sneered at this. “Do you even have enough money leftover from your birthday?” She set the cake gingerly in the fridge.
He went back and stirred the stew. How much money did he have anyways? After all the food he bought from the convenience store, he wasn't sure anymore...
“For your information, you have exactly $15.06”
“Nee-san, that can't be right!”
She affirmed solemnly, saying a small buddhist prayer. “I'm sorry Ryuu, but with your finances, I hardly think you even have enough money to buy Jump for the rest of the year, let alone a new game!”
Tanaka's shoulders sagged as despair creeped into his heart. He could kiss all his new shiny pokemon goodbye!
“Luckily, your reliable nee-san has you covered!” She grabbed his shoulders excitedly. “I got you a part time job!”
“Wait, really? That's really awesome Saeko! What is it?” Tanaka asked.
Saeko choked a little, wondering what to tell him. The truth can probably wait till later, I think! I'm so sorry Ryuu, I'll buy you a ton of steamed buns later~
“Well uh... one of my close friends who happens to work as a photographer had their model cancel on them, and they needed someone with a 'crazy' image right away. It's only for a couple of days, and you'll be fine!” Saeko said, patting Ryuunosuke's back assuredly. “Upside is, you'll definitely have enough money to buy the DS and more!”

She wasn't lying, that much Tanaka could say when all of it was done and through. He had successfully bought the game and the limited edition DS so he couldn't say that he was an unhappy man. He just hoped that nobody within fifteen feet of him had ever discovered that magazine shoot. They had mercifully left out his real name, but he wished he had a bag over his head instead.
Neither God nor Buddha were on Tanaka's side months later, however. The first years were cleaning up the club room when a magazine fell out of the back of a shelf. Hinata eagerly picked it up, only to find that a certain page had been bookmarked. In all of Hinata's infinite sunshine attitude, he flipped to the bookmarked page.
“OH MY GOD!? TANAKA-SENPAI???” He yelled at the top of his lungs, which carried all the way into the gymnasium.
Sugawara's instincts kicked in as he ran into the club room, followed by Daichi, Tanaka, Nishinoya, Azumane, and many of the other second years still on campus.
“Hinata, what the heck happened-”
Hinata and Kageyama's faces were red, and Tsukishima was laughing out loud soundly. Yamaguchi, bless his soul, in an effort to hold back his laughter had two hands over his mouth with his shoulders shaking vehemently.
Tanaka tried to walk away as fast as possible when he saw the magazine, but Daichi grabbed his arm before he could get away. Sugawara glanced at him apologetically.
“Shouyou, what's up with the racket!?” Nishinoya said, stomping over and grabbing the magazine out of his hands.
It was definitely a sight to behold. Tanaka Ryuunosuke, at the tender age of sixteen was splayed out in front of a red couch, casually making bedroom eyes at the camera while an unknown off-screen man tilted his head upwards. He had a beautifully photoshopped dragon tattoo curling over the contours of his chest and navel and extremely tight short shorts displaying his manhood. At the very bottom of the photo, an elegant white “Stubbies” logo adorned the bottom of the page.
Nishinoya fell to his knees, clutching the magazine in his hands. “R-Ryuu, I n-never knew you were a super model!”
The third years approached Nishinoya carefully. Tsukishima and Yamaguchi had finished laughing and were jeering at Tanaka's “nice body”. A fierce blush spread across cheeks as he tried to dislodge himself from Daichi's grip.
“Daichi-san! C'mon, I don't need to be here for this! I j-just remembered I had an errand to run back home-”
Sugawara whispered a nearly inaudible “I'm sorry” as he walked out of the room, dragging all the first years with him. Azumane and Nishinoya left quietly afterwards, though Noya could be heard saying “Wow Ryuu is so photogenic!” outside. It was just Daichi and Tanaka in the club room now, like a nightmare come true.
Daichi's face was completely neutral when he picked up the magazine, but a faint smile broke out after studying the picture.
“Oi Tanaka.”
“Yes, Daichi-san?!” he said in a slightly unmanly high pitched voice.
“Explain.”

After a good fifteen minutes of interrogation, Daichi concluded that Tanaka had neither gotten himself into any trouble, nor broken any of the school rules. Just as they left the room, Daichi offered one final piece of advice with the same inexplicable smile.
“Hey Tanaka, shorts and tattoos might be a good investment for you, you should look into that.” leaving a thoroughly red kouhai in his wake.